By: Karen Hastings, Hertfordshire

In any therapeutic intervention that is designed to achieve change, it is important to have an understanding of the beliefs and values held by the person wishing to change. NLP therapists are able to work with clients to eradicate limiting beliefs. NLP therapists are available to provide NLP in Herts.

Have you ever taken the time to stop and think about your beliefs and values. Ask yourself – where have my beliefs originated? How do they guide how I live my life? Do my values and beliefs serve me?

Beliefs and Values form the essence of your identity and you should ask yourself these questions for the following reasons:

Beliefs are like a pair of glasses:
Put your glasses on and they filter how you view the world. Beliefs act in the same way. You will have beliefs about yourself, your skills and capabilities, how others see you and what type of person you are. You will also have beliefs about other people, how they operate, how to communicate with them, what drives them. Basically, you have beliefs about everything, including the world, politics, social issues, concepts, and religion. Beliefs underlie your internal representations, which is your map of the world. Your beliefs also filter sensory data that you take in from the environment and favour sensory data that supports and confirms your beliefs. We know form NLP models that the internal representations people hold effect their emotional state and behaviour. Therefore, beliefs have an influence on your emotional state and behaviour.

Beliefs and Values are your motivators:
The core beliefs you hold are your motivators, they are the basis from which you function in the world. People tend to works towards things that they value. For example, if you value having a high-powered career this may take priority over other aspects of your life such as time with your family.

Beliefs distort how you view the world:
Every belief and value is basically a generalisation that you have made abut the world. Generalisations are distortions. Often when a client presents with a problem, there is a distorted belief or value behind it. For example, “my partner doesn’t phone me enough, this means he doesn’t love me”. Once you are able to become more aware of the distorted beliefs you hold, it is possible to begin to question them and challenge them. NLP therapy has a specific tool called the meta-model that is able to uncover the troublesome distortions and generalisations that people are making.

Beliefs and values determines what happens to you
Beliefs about the world and yourself can actually determine what happens. They are not just thoughts but effect what you focus on. We know in NLP that what you focus on your more likely to get. This is because your unconscious mind cannot understand negatives. So for example, if you focus on not being in debt, your unconscious mind will be on the lookout for debt in the environment and various ways to bring debt to your attention. NLP therapy teaches people the importance of communicating in the positive when you are thinking. This means saying what you do want not what you don’t want. Most people have heard of the placebo effect. This is a phenomenon in which a pill is given which contains no active ingredients. There are many studies that show that people given a placebo will experience a therapeutic benefit and in some cases get well based on the belief that they will be well.

Changing your beliefs:
As an NLP therapist, people often come to see me at my OT, NLP, CBT and hypnotherapy practice in Herts because they are having problems with limiting beliefs, e.g. “No one could find me attractive”, “I cant lose weight or give up smoking”, “I’m useless in social situations”, “I’m bad at presentations”. Of, course, they are often not aware that their belief is the source of their unhappiness when they initially come to see me. Limiting beliefs hold people back and prevent them from doing things they want too. When we believe we cant do something our behaviour will usually confirm this. As discussed above, you will act in a way and look out for evidence to confirm your beliefs. NLP and CBT therapy has effective techniques for changing illogical and limiting beliefs that can allow you to move on and experience the world through a new pair of glasses. There is no excuse to let your limiting beliefs hold you back any longer!

www.selfimageimprovement.com

Karen Hastings has worked in the NHS with people with mental-health problems. She also practices occupational therapy, CBT, NLP and hypnotherapy in Hertfordshire. More information is avaliable at www.karenhastings.co.uk

by Marsha D. Egan, CPCU, ACC

To have a more fulfilling life, it is helpful for you to try to run your life rather than having it “run you.” Here are some tips to help you do that.

Know and Live your Values

First of all, it is important for you to know what your values are. Values drive the way you live your life. They are the backbone that will help you make decisions when there is no roadmap. Values are personal, and they should be yours alone. Take some time and write them down.

It’s a challenge to continually live your values. That’s why it is important to write them down and review them regularly. It has been said that people judge you by your actions, while you judge yourself by your intentions. Make sure your actions and intentions match!

Have Goals

Once you’ve articulated your values, it’s time for you to think about your life goals. Some of these are long term, and some can be short term. The harsh reality is that only about 2% of everyone in the world has goals. Yet goals are instrumental in helping people achieve what they want. But even more than that, it is important to have goals that are BIG. It’s true that if you write goals down, you’ll be much more likely to accomplish them. So try it. See what happens!

When you have goals, you have focus. They will give you direction and purpose. They enable you to work your plan, rather than planning your work. They give you a greater sense of control and excitement for your life.

Live in Balance

Values and goals are lived best when you have balance in your life. Fulfillment in one area fuels each other area. Too much emphasis in one area can drain the others. It’s important to assess your balance, from time to time, and to take steps to assure that your life is well rounded physically, emotionally, intellectually, attitudinally and purposefully.

Live in the Moment

When you believe that only YOU control your attitude, and you combine it with recognizing your ability to live in the moment, you can truly control your enjoyment of life. Too many people live in the past or the future, and it inhibits their abililty to enjoy the actual moment they’re experiencing. You have a CHOICE to be happy or sad, a CHOICE to worry or anticipate, a CHOICE to be positive or negative. What is yours?

Be Passionate

Lastly, it is important that you fill your life with passion. Be passionate about who you are, what you have, and what you do. If you don’t have passion for these things, you are just walking through your life. Knowing that your attitude is your choice, you can also have a choice about being passionate.

Be Willing to Change

When some part of your life soesn’t seem to be working, you should be willing to make changes. Changing is difficult, but a lackluster life may be even more difficult over the long run! Figure out what it is you want to change, set a goal to do it, work that plan, then celebrate your new fulfillment!

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How to determine Your Values:

When you write your values, write them in the present. Here are some examples: “I am financially secure,” “I add value,” “I am physically fit.” Here are some areas that you might consider for articulating your values: finances, community, family, relationships, work, education, health, and attitude.

The best way to set about articulating your values is to take some private time, and write down as many of your values as you can. They will start to fall into groups or categories with a major value defining them. They’ll fall into values with clarifying statements. Here’s an example:

I am financially secure

–I pay my bills in advance

–I save x% of my income

–I have X% of my salary in reserve

–I review my insurance annually

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How to Write Goals

Goals should describe the result, or what success looks like, rather than the way you will get there. Don’t say, “I will be on the ABC diet for 3 weeks,” because that describes the means, rather than the end. Goals should also be SMART: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Timebound. Instead of saying, “I want to lose weight,” it’s more effective to say, “I will lose 10 pounds by May 1. By giving yourself definite targets with specific dates, your chances of meeting or exceeding your goals will increase.

Some of the goals might drive directly from your values; as an example, if your value is to save x% of your income, and you are not there yet, That could be one of your goals.

I like to have my clients vision themselves at age ninety, sitting on their front porches, rocking happily, thinking back on their lives, smiling over what they’d accomplished. If that were you, what would those accomplishments be? To put a child through college? To run a marathon? To visit every state in the US?

www.selfimageimprovement.com

Feed Shark
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COPYRIGHT:
Copyright, Marsha D. Egan, CPCU, PCC, CEO of The Egan Group, Inc., http://marshaegan.com . Marsha is a certified executive coach and professional speaker, specializing in leadership development and positive change. You can reach her at marsha@marshaegan.com

Designing a Future Marked by High Self-Esteem

By: Dr. Joe Rubino

Studies show that more than 85% of the world’s population suffers from some degree of diminished self-worth. For most people who lack a positive self-image, the future looks like a mere extension of their troubled past. Their expectation of what is to be is consistent with what has been — with a slight and predictable level of improvement. Because of their lacking self-esteem, most are resigned to a life that lacks the excitement and passion that characterizes the lives of those who feel worthy of tapping into the best things life has to offer. People who possess a positive self-image typically have an optimistic expectation of what is ahead of them and as a result, they realize this expectation as a self-fulfilling prophesy.

In contrast to the state of resignation that typifies those with diminished self-esteem, consider the possibility that the future lives as the realization of a promise — a promise you make to yourself and to the world. The future will result from your expectations and the quality of your future will be impacted by the commitment you have for it. It lives as a possibility. In other words, you get to invent it. In fact, you are the sole designer and architect of what is to be and the result will be entirely consistent with your expectation and your self-image.

In other words, our future will be directly related to what we expect for it to be. If we doubt our self-worth and expect our future lives to be worse than our current situation, we will sabotage ourselves into making it turn out in alignment with this self-fulfilling prophesy. If we limit our expectations and plan on more of the same results we have experienced to date, our apathy will generate a future consistent with this expectation. To the contrary, if we believe in ourselves and our expectation is that our future will be better than our present situation, self-motivation will lead to actions that will bring about the positive outcome we envision.

If we feel good about ourselves and expect to live happy, fulfilled, and successful lives, we will take the actions consistent with realizing that expectation. We will therefore generate the opportunities that will result in rich relationships, abundance, and joy being attracted to our lives – because we believe we deserve it and act on this belief.

We get what we expect and attract prosperity or lack, joy or sorrow, rewarding relationships or angry, frustrating ones all as a result of whether or not we feel worthy. Just as we can doubt our abilities to succeed and our worthiness of attracting rewarding friends and intimate relationships, we can also instead choose to take full responsibility for expecting all aspects of our lives to be the way we want them to turn out. When we come from this positive mindset and commit to manifesting our dream lives, we put forth an energy that attracts all the things we desire to us.

Realize that you have consciously or unconsciously attracted everything that shows up in your life to you. If where you are in life, the relationships you have attracted to you, your physical, financial, emotional and spiritual states are not what you desire, decide now to alter your course. Decide that you deserve better. Get in touch with the erroneous decisions you made at an early age that impacted your self-esteem. Reframe how you see yourself and resolve to act from a declaration of who you are (just because you say so) instead of the unlovable, somehow defective or unworthy image you made up or bought into long ago.

Change your expectations. Design a life plan consistent with your new expectations. Make requests of those who can support your efforts in some way. The future exists for each of us as a possibility. When we do the necessary work to complete our troubled past and put the self-interpretations that do not support us behind, we can courageously decide to design our future lives deliberately to be in alignment with joy, abundance, fun, fulfillment, and self-love. When we train ourselves to first expect positive results and then to act in accordance with what we expect, we set the stage for a bright and promising tomorrow. We have the personal power to create our future on purpose. The future can unfold out of our declaration of how we see ourselves and what we expect it to be like. To the extent that we take responsibility to expect great things in our lives, ensure we give off positive, attractive, loving energy and then get into action to bring about our expectations, we will be the force behind the realization of a rewarding happy future characterized by soaring self-esteem.

So, my challenge for you today is to write out a clear and specific vision of exactly what your life will be like in every area including your relationships, health, wealth and finances, occupation, recreation and social life, and personal and spiritual development. Commit to resolving any past issues that continue to erode how you feel about yourself. I wrote “The Self-Esteem Book” and the accompanying “The Self-Esteem Workbook” to support you to learn the tools that will allow you to reinvent your life and how you see yourself. When you realize that you have the power to transform your world and enhance the quality of experiences you attract to you, you will begin to act upon opportunities for manifesting joy, fulfillment, abundance, success, and meaningful relationships. There are no accidents. You are reading this article now because you have attracted the opportunity to take a significant step forward. Seize the chance and begin to look for the countless opportunities to impact your life all around you on a daily basis. Transformation begins with the intention to look for opportunities that can make a difference in your life and then taking bold, focused action in the direction of your vision. All that it takes is courage to begin the process of restoring your personal magnificence and a commitment to consistent awareness and effective actions.

What’s holding you back ??? Do you realise that their are things that are preventing you from achieving your true potential. Have you ever thought why me? Go to the link below and get this free report, it will have a big impact on your life.

http://www.selfimageimprovement.com/freereport/freereport.php

Many people see and hear about opportunities, but sadly do nothing. My advice is to take action now. Everything is waiting for you.

Enjoy !!

I just attended a great seminar with world speakers showing how the internet can enhance our lives by creating wealth on line. How powerful the internet is today. So many people are turning to the net for information. You can learn so much from people like Stephen Pierce who at one time was homeless, and now earns a millions of dollars online.

Stephen now travels the world teaching people about creating freedom from your home, through the internet. You too can model all of these speakers and copy what they do to be successful. We live in a information world at our finger tips. There are no excuses for not saying you don’t know anymore.

Live your life by choice, not by chance.

There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made,and which in its original state, permeates,penetrates,and fills the interspaces of the universe.

A thought in this substance produces the thing that is imaged by the thought.

 A person can form things in his thought, and by impressing his thought upon formless substance, can cause the big thing he thinks about to be created

 ”Getting rich is doing things in a certain way.” I have been using this for the last 6 months and have found that it has certainly worked for me.

After studying the Science Of Getting rich, it has become obvious to me that a major key to getting what you want, is to be grateful. To have Gratitude each and every day, that is to say instead of complaining of things that are not right, be grateful for what you have.

It doesn’t matter who you are, or where you are, there is always someone worse off than you.

This can be challenging for some people to grasp, especially if they are going through hard times.However the power of contrast is amazing.

So each day give thanks for what you have around you. Gratitude is also an attitude. Be grateful for the little things as well in your life. Many people give thanks before eating their meal. The more grateful you are, the closer you become to the things you desire.

Abundance is your birth right.

So from now, focus on how grateful you are right at this moment as you read this. I’m writing this to you also in a state of Gratitude. I’m so grateful that I can share this message with everyone who reads it.

Life is a magnificent journey, so make every day your masterpiece, starting with Gratitude each day.I promise you that people around you will notice a difference in you and you will attract great things into your life.

Remember life is not a dress rehearsal,you are  the CEO of your life.

Live Your Life By Choice, Not By Chance.

Most people I meet dont know what they want.They find it hard to know what they want. Since watching the movie the secret,we have been shown a few ideas that have helped us as well.

So to get what you want in life you have to GET CLEAR in your mind what you want, and where you want to go etc, then take action. Otherwise you will just be attracting the same stuff as now.

Change can happen in a heart beat, have you ever heard some one say THAT’S IT, I’m going to change things. Unfortunately we seem to wait till the pain builds up and then we decide to change.

To Get Clear is to get positive results in your life. Listen to the Attraction Accelerator and let it work for you. Its available at my web site.

Remember Live your Life By Choice, Not By Chance.